Is this it?

I give up.

Have you ever thought of giving up something your so obsessed with? But no matter how hard you tried, you can never do it? Well, I have. Up until now I haven't given it up yet. I feel disappointed with myself because it kills me little by little, everyday just by looking at it. I know its wrong and yet I keep it going on. I know one day the world might end with just a blink of an eye. I know I don't have much time. I have to get prepared but right now, I'm sitting down on this brown old chair doing the same thing all over again. It hurts to see that whenever I put my effort into it, I can never succeed. I try and try but keep on failing.
Sometimes I just wonder..
Why do I even try?